do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
