He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize