DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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