dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
