It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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