It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Bang-toberfest begins!!
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
