I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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