yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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