i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
