we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
