i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize