You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
