What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
