dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
