what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
