Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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