Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
