There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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