He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
