I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
