His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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