i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Someone signed my nipple.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize