you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
