i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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