it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
