Got a toothbrush?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
