So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
