Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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