I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Everything about him screamed your future.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
