i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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