I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Randomize
