just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Randomize
