I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
