Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
