Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
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