He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
