Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize