just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Too much gin, very little bucket
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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