Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
