I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
