Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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