Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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