you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize