the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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