don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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