the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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