She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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