Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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