Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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