I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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