If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
