Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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