I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
we're making bets on your personal life
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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