I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I can't turn off my feet"
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize